A subject less talked about...

The subject that I have chosen today fills me with the risk of getting exposed. As every living human being is most afraid of getting exposed so am I. Everybody to some extent gets fidgety when their feelings touch the ground of exposure. To be specific I am talking only about the over sensitive feelings…not just any feelings. Let me remind myself that some people are brave enough for not guarding their feelings and prove to be a great warrior in the battlefield called Life. But I am no great warrior; I am but a plain and fearful being that is afraid of getting exposed. At a slightest indication of getting exposed I hide myself in a cocoon, rarely then I trouble myself of coming out…the people who have known me might think otherwise though…I am sure you must be thinking of what the subject might be.

Let me introduce the subject to you, it is…

But wait the fear of getting exposed is not letting me come up with the subject. The feeling that I am experiencing right now is of the same kind when I happened to propose someone. Before I touch base on the subject let me narrate this incident to you. Don’t worry I will not go into the details… so the incident goes like this, I happen to call this guy whom I thought to be just perfect for me (that’s the reason you propose I guess), and vomited out all my feelings to him and felt that have committed an act of bravery…I was all happy to be relieved of the burden, only to find out that it was one sided! Heartbreak it was. The minute I came to know that it was all one sided all the feelings for him just got evaporated in the air (guess it was not true love or my ego…I still can’t decide). It was a relief that I was out of it…but the crime was committed, I was exposed in front of a person who was not even worth. Don’t misunderstand me I don’t have any regrets, I still find myself to be brave enough to have done it. It is of course was a brave act for a girl like me as until then I detested girls who proposed! After my act I find them courageous enough. It was a mixed feeling that I experienced, I felt independent (of him and of the burden) but with that I foster a kind of hatred for myself for having getting exposed. I think these incidents only happen to make you more mature. Same feeling capture my mind when I am about to introduce the subject…

On second thoughts maybe some other time!